No Such Thing As A Sure Thing
|Season 7, Episode 4|
Gary H. Miller
October 15, 1999
"There's no such thing as a sure thing."
As the entire Pennbrook student body prepares for the big football game against the Amish, Shawn and Angela bask in their newly-reunited status by making out nonstop. Everyone else really wants to beat the Amish, as it is something they've been unable to do for 47 straight years. Jack tells Eric that Vegas puts the Amish as 14-1 underdogs, and Eric is surprised to hear of Jack's old gambling habit. There's cause for concern when the school mascot, Pengy the Pennbrook Penguin, turns out to be an Amish spy. But Eric hunts him down. Outside, Cory confronts Topanga. He repeats his belief that she's being ridiculous and tries to kiss her, but when she shoves him away, almost hitting his head on a nearby brick wall, Cory says that he done and gives up on her. When Eric strolls by telling him that there's a vacancy in the mascot position, Cory quickly volunteers to be the new Pengy.
At the Matthews' house at dinner that night, conversations go flying. Eric and Jack talk about their anticipation for the game, with the concept of gambling coming up. Morgan tells Jack that she hears that he has a problem. Cory is excited about being the penguin, but no one else seems to care. Alan and Amy do say that it is good of him to move past Topanga, though. Even later at the student union, Cory accepts an offer of a girl inviting him to her room. But Rachel isn't having as good a day. She's trying to tutor Jerry Mungo, the star running back, because Mr. Feeny won't let him play if he fails his upcoming exam. Jack sees this and, knowing that there's no way Jerry will pass Feeny's test, places a $1,000 bet on the Amish. Eric does the same without actually knowing what he's doing.
Topanga sees Cory make his date and becomes even more unhappy. She sits down in the student union, very lonely. Angela takes a break from making out with Shawn to talk to her friend. She says she thought she was pushing him away to protect him, but she was only hurting them both. Now that they're back together, they've never been happier. Topanga thinks on this and leaves just as Eric enters on a big fancy bike. Jack recognizes it as a $5,000 bike and Eric explains that he upped their bet by $4,000. Jack knows it's stupid, but Eric is convinced that Jerry Mungo will never play in the game. To ensure it, he seeks out Mr. Feeny to confirm what the conditions are. Feeny says that a 65 is passing, and Mungo won't play under any circumstances. Eric pretends to be upset over this and leaves, telling Jack that it's in the bag. Despite Jack's pleas, Eric reenters to room to give Feeny one more verbal jab. He leaves, and Feeny stares off in contemplation.
Topanga's parents arrive at her apartment; Jedediah plans to tell Topanga about his leaving Rhiannon for another woman, thinking that Topanga will still love him as her father, but Topanga angrily kicks him out instead, swearing she hates him. Rhiannon consoles her, telling her that he's her father and she loves him no matter what. She also says that what happens between her and Jedidiah involves only them, and that Topanga shouldn't use what happened between her parents as a barometer to gauge what could happen between her and Cory. Topanga is moved by her mother's level of interest, and Rhiannon then says that she wouldn't trade what she had even if she knew it would eventually end.
As the school gets ready for the game during a pep rally, Mr. Feeny shows up, much to the liking of Jack and Eric, with news. He says that Jerry Mungo will play, and shares that he tutored Jerry nonstop until he got a 65 on the test. Eric and Jack are horrified, and when two thugs show up to collect their fees, Jack and Eric make a run for it. Topanga also shows up to the pep rally and spots the mascot. Thinking it's Cory, she tells him to say nothing and just hold her. As the penguin's hand slides over her rear end, she sees Cory over its shoulder and, with one punch, knocks Pengy out. Cory tells her that she was right, he was a horrible penguin. Topanga says she loves him and wants to marry him. They fall on the floor. Topanga says that even if they one day separate, nothing could change what they have now. They begin to make out on the floor, and as everyone else goes to the game, only 4 people remain in the student union: Cory and Topanga still on the floor, Angela and Shawn sharing a chair nearby, both couples obliviously making out.
In the tag, Eric and Jack are disguised as Amish folk to hide from their bookie. Eric loves Anna Lewendike, an Amish girl, but she shuns him and has her brothers pummel him. He calls out to her from their carriage, and she throws a pitchfork his way. Jack and Eric make their escape.
- Sasha Barrese as Janine
- Marcia Cross as Rhiannon Lawrence
- Mark Harelik as Jedidiah Lawrence
- Grant Garrison as Jerry Mungo
- Ryan Preimesberger as football player
- While it is possible that Danny the bookie could be Gambling Dan from the previous season, it is highly unlikely, as Gambling Dan was a college senior who merely played cards while Danny the bookie is an actual bookie with enforcers.
- When Jack calls the bookie, the official subtitles list his surname as "Connor."
- This is the first episode to show Jack's gambling addiction.
- This marks the beginning of Cory and Topanga's fifth relationship.